Nap and Night Fears: What Can You Do?

Battling Child Fears

Fear of the dark or even a darkened room is quite common in kids. A child may sleep just fine at night until one night becomes quite frightened in a darkened room. Some kids in child care are also resistant to taking naps in dark, quiet areas. Child experts say some kids naturally are prone to developing night fears; others may have experienced or watched something that adds new fears, which translates to be scared in the dark. So what to do?

Parents and providers alike should consider any recent changes to a child's environment and whether a specific event could have triggered the new fear. Has there been a recent move, change in family status, addition or death of a family member, a different child provider, or new pre-school schedule? If there has been something that has changed, it could just be that some additional adjustment time is needed. Kids are very sensitive to what they see on television or read, and so consideration should be given to any scary story or program (remember that many cartoons feature bad guys and even clowns or super-heroes are frightening to some youngsters).

If you've ruled out a significant cause that may need to be remedied, and are still puzzled over sudden night fears, consider these steps for help:

• Avoid poking fun, teasing or "dismissing" a child's fears. Never try and simply talk a child out of being scared. This adult action can prolong a fear and also affect a child's trust in his caregiver or parent.



• Keep patient and caring when around a child with fears. Do not come across exasperated or irritated at a child's fears, no matter how small. You want to come across as trying to help reach a solution; not to be divisive or dismissive.



• Create a protector or a "monster buster" or whatever might work to empower a child to have a defense against night fears. Whether it is a special superhero stuffed animal, a monster buster juice (can be water in a spray bottle), or a taplight next to the pillow she can tap on whenever she feels the need, try and create a solution that works for everyone.



• Allow a child control of some lighting, and don't insist he sleep in total darkness. Consider a flashlight that turns off when a child is no longer pressing the on switch, a nightlight, lamp, or leaving a light on in the closet. Remember that lights are often requested for a short while until children outgrow these fears. If you can accommodate the request safely and conveniently, do so without fuss or discussion. Try and make it as much of a "non event" as possible.



• Avoid getting into the child sleeping with parents or staying with the provider while other kids nap routine. Once this practice starts, it becomes very difficult to break. If a child comes to you in the evening expressing fears, explain that his room is safe and reassure him that he has everything he needs to sleep well. If you must, try and stay with a child with fears in her room until she settles down and goes back to sleep, rather than taking her into yours.



• Understand that kids develop fears through different stages of their development, and that all things typically pass. Usually, within a few weeks or months, night fears will be a childhood stage of the past, and your youngster will be onto something new and different.