Gentleness Training Can Help Toddlers Adjust

Expecting another baby? Or, does your child play too roughly with playmates or even the family pet? Sounds like some "gentleness training" is in order. Toddlers don't necessarily know how to behave properly around a newborn, young puppy, or even a playmate. That's where adults step in to serve as role models and teach "gentleness." Here's how.

• Show your child gentleness skills and role-play the actions. If you're expecting a new baby, have your child practice how to be gentle using a doll or favorite stuffed animal. Be sure to explain why a youngster needs to be gentle, and why an infant's back and neck needs to be supported. Kids are curious, and will react better if they understand that an infant is not capable of holding the head up.



• Teach that gentleness means voice and movement. Too many toddlers achieve gentle motions, only to startle or scare a newborn or even new animal through frenzied movements and shrieking voices. Teach a toddler that calmness and gentleness is best reflected through slow, controlled movement, soft voice, and gentle touch. Demonstrate how a toddler should touch a baby (include when and where as well) and how a young animal should be petted. The same holds true for a playmate; toddlers should be taught how to converse and touch a playmate (explain that nobody likes to be poked, prodded, yelled at, kicked, etc., even in play).



• Be a positive role model. Kids learn best by example. Adults should demonstrate calm and gentle tone and actions. Older toddlers will understand how it makes them feel vs. when someone is yelling, bopping, or otherwise frenzying around them. If you exhibit yelling and are constantly moving and on the go, then why would your toddler act otherwise?



• Praise generously and avoid the temptation to criticize. Don't tell a toddler that he's doing it wrong; instead, offer better ways to practice holding a doll or stroking a puppy's fur. Don't overly put pressure on a youngster about expectations for gentleness; the lessons should be instilled over an amount of time. Use praise generously. Offer to take a picture of the child with his new puppy or newborn sister when he has learned how to be gentle, and show it off to teachers, family and friends.
  
  

Gentleness is a learned behavior, and with proper parenting guidance, kids will master the calm and gentle skills needed to be the doting sibling or pet-owner!